The Great Divide - Age Gap Discussion

Help! Who here has experience with kids with a (large) age gap between them? 

My boys are Little Guy: age 4 and seven months and Noodle: age 9 and three months. Almost five years between them.

Little Guy does not attend kindergarten or a preschool. The new school year starts in April, he'll be in the K2 class (commencing a two year program). Therefore he doesn't really have any friends of his own.

Noodle is just winding up Grade 3. 

Obviously Little Guy thinks the world of Noodle. He waits all day for him to come home and can't believe that Noodle doesn't quite feel the same way. 

Noodle is just starting to come out of his shell. He has a small gang of friends from school that he likes to invite over or to meet up with. If one of the boys comes to our house then Little Guy tries to claim the friend as his own and take over. It's so annoying. If Noodle asks to meet a friend at the park then Little Guy tries to follow him there. At four, he's too little to go to the park without an adult, don't you think? And I don't want Noodle to be the only one with his mum there so I don't go and neither does Little Guy. He cries and kicks up a fuss.

Homework is another issue. Noodle has heaps. Little Guy likes to think he has homework but his version of it requires Noodle to 'help'. I'm constantly having to remove Little Guy from the homework area so Noodle can concentrate.

Then we turn our attention to bed time. Little Guy needs a lot of sleep these days. BUT since he moved into Noodle's room a few months ago he doesn't really like to go to bed on his own. He wants to wait up for Noodle. 

Noodle is out in the evenings a few days a week now. I'm having a very hard time coordinating the pickup since it coincides with Little Guy's bed time. I'm not that strict about his bed 'time' but it's pretty hard to bundle a half asleep boy onto the back of my bicycle.

So this week, it's been a week of it. I have tried to get Little Guy to have a little nap in the afternoon so he can last the distance (unsuccessfully I might add). I am availing myself in the afternoons for play with Little Guy so Noodle can get stuff done. I've encouraged Little Guy to play with a couple of neighborhood girls who seem to enjoy his company - just so he can have his own friends. I'm still considering getting Little Guy started at swimming or something like that but honestly I am exhausted enough with all the running around I have to do with Noodle four afternoon/evenings a week.

Please tell me the age gap gets better or do I have the awful adolescent years with Noodle approaching? When the pesky little brother simply will not be tolerated?


  1. I'm feeling so much better about my kids being 19 and 21 months apart...

    Hope you get some good advice here!

  2. I am sure one, two, three or five years apart kids are a handful!

  3. My eldest boys are just under 2 years apart (3 and 5), and my house sounds very similar! Little brothers just always want to be like their big brothers (or siblings). My brother and I are 4 years apart. There were times growing up that felt really big, but not a lot. As adults, we are as thick as thieves, love him!

  4. There are 5 and a half years between my sister and myself. Things will settle down when little guy goes to school and has his own thing. Kindergarten may help some too. At least he will be out of your hair so you have some time on your own during the day. It may not seem so bad to have to cater to him after that then.

    My sister was always trying to catch me up and as you know, she has now surpassed me and beyond;)

    Best of luck, looking forward to a long chat.

  5. Sorry I don't have any advice for you, but I just wanted to sympathise! Son number 2 is due in a month, so my two will be 3 years apart. I'm sure that will have its own challenges too...


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